It has been overwhelming lately. Overwhelming in a good way. There had been so many blessings, so many realizations...
- My father and mother celebrated their 34th wedding anniversary. We had a surprise celebration and it was such a meaningful and touching moment. I'm grateful for friends who were there, relatives and friends of my parents that made my mom and dad so happy that day. I'm going to upload their video soon. :)
- I was healed last last Sunday... and last Sunday was a reaffirmation for me. God spoke love words which I really am blessed to hear because of the Feast. I really feel blessed! Every time I go to the feast, my soul is nourished! I do miss the solemnity of the Mass at St. Peter though. They celebrate Mass differently there - it's more for the youth. But I do LOOOVEEE to praise and worship and the talk after. Last Sunday, I was so touched by the prophecy Brother Obet shared... I really felt as though God has spoken to me through the love words he used. Thank you Lord. I don't deserve it but I am grateful.
- I was overwhelmed with my latest entry - there was so many people who reaffirmed me... thank you for all who posted their comments. I really could feel the love and sincerity of your words. I really am blessed to have you all as friends. Originally, I thought of just posting the entry in my blogspot... and I forgot I had an automatic post entry to multiply. But still, it was a blessing because I was able to see your messages and was quite touched. (My "quite" is English... did you know that "quite" in American and "quite" in English has a different meaning? "Quite" means "very much" in English unlike American's "quite" which means a little bit... just a trivia I learned)
- I am able to bring other people to God's presence! I was with Elma at the feast and I was so glad that she felt so refreshed after. I also accompanied her to St. Jude last Saturday. it was a "Godly" weekend!
- My two best friends treated me for lunch at Cyma. And we had a great afternoon, catching up and updating each other always felt so great with the both of you... :)
I learned so many lessons as well... but to me these are the most striking:
- God loves me... as is where is.
- There are no mistakes, just lessons to be learned.
- The opposite of love is apathy.
Thank you, Lord. I really am overwhelmed. I hope I can pay this forward and glorify You even more.
for the longest time, i've been carrying a burden so heavy i think i almost lost it. i've been sleeping less, my face bore the stress and i've lost weight. i couldn't bear to open up with my friends regarding my problem. all i had in mind was... why did i let it happen again?
i've been broken and healed before. and it took me a long time to rise. and i've been happy for the past few years until it happened again. and this time, it was much bigger than i could ever imagine. i don't know why i let it go that far. maybe subconsciously, i was thinking i deserve them because i worked so hard.
so even if i shared my problem to a few of my closest closest friends, i still feel so bad. i felt so dirty, felt so sinful that i could not love myself. even if help was extended, i couldn't make myself be happy.
until this sunday. i went to the feast with my family that fateful morning. it was the first time my sister opened up the subject of going to the feast. although i wanted them to come badly to the feast before, i was rejected the first time and didn't invite my family again. it was God's timing that my sister opened up the subject of going to the feast. and so my mom and i went with my sister and JC.
i had so many realizations. but one of them was... God loves me... as is where is
. even if i am a sinner, he still loves me. and i realize that what kept me from being fully happy is that i never loved myself truly. and it hindered me from really being happy.
so today, for the first time in so many months, i woke up and felt so light. i came early to the office as well. i had a good day at work. i was blessed that i got a taxi right away going home despite the rain. there's so much blessing that has found its way back to me again... or maybe they have been there all the time... because now i open my eyes to see them. :)
my boss said i was giddy because i had a cute principal that came this morning. but it wasn't that. this is all God's doing. and i'll proudly boast of that fact... cause He has found me again... and I'm really grateful He never lets go...